weekly blog--one for the ages
Shhh…I have a secret. I would really like to tell you, but I won’t because you are more likely to tell someone else, and then word would get out, and the secret would no longer be a secret and it might damage my reputation.
So why is it so hard to not spill the beans? A Baylor College of Medicine expert says that secrets often involve something that someone does not take pride in. As soon as you tell somebody not to repeat your secret, people begin to have an obsessive, anxious urge to share it with somebody. And that sharing is often with a confidant who is then likely to share it with their own confidant.
So why divulge a secret in the first place? To start, people often feel like it will help them maintain close friendships with others. It’s also a way to reinforce a sense of trust with close family members, spouses or parents. And it doesn’t make a difference if you tell your secret to someone who is quiet and prefers to keep everything in, or to someone who is more talkative. The primal urge to tell someone else can be overwhelming.
Some advice from the experts: If you do not want to be responsible for keeping someone’s secret, it is best to be upfront and tell the person you do not want to know it. If you end up accidently sharing a secret with somebody else, it is best to be honest and let the person know that you shared their secret.